I have never looked forward to the turning of a new year as much as I am now. I realize there is no magic at the stroke of midnight between December 31st and January 1st… but for some reason it seems like in that moment, when we go from 2011 to 2012 a fresh start will be laid in my lap. I know that 2012 already has a long list of trails and tests to get through… but I am so looking forward to saying good-bye to 2011!
As the New Year approaches, so do resolutions… I think they are fun. For the past 3 years, my resolution has been to eat onion dip and Ruffles chips at least once a month for the full year. Sadly, another year has passed where I only ate it a handful of months… I feel like such a failure. Therefore, once again I resolve that I will enjoy this delicious snack at least once a month for the year. Fourth times a charm… right? (I went to Sam's Club and bought the 12 pack of onion dip mix... no excuses!)My serious resolution comes from something that has been stirring in me for the past several weeks. We received a Christmas card and family letter from our friends who walked with us through Madison’s death and were in the support group with us. This year their family experienced another heartbreaking loss of a mother/grandma. In the letter they wrote, “We try to remind ourselves to instill in our children that each day is a gift and it shouldn’t be wasted fighting, being angry, being lazy or being bored.” Understanding in agreement that each day truly is a gift, I have recently found myself becoming aware of the daily/hourly/momentary choice to be either positive or negative in my thoughts and actions. It is from this line of thinking that I resolve to choose to eliminate negativity whenever possible.
As I have thought about this resolution, I realize that this will actually require a significant life change. I will need to be conscious of my mental state as I fight this nasty disease and battle thru chemo by choosing joy. It means being aware and turning off negativity on television and movies. Being aware of negative relationships and taking action to change them or remove myself. I need to be aware of my tone of voice and words that I speak and take intentional action to speak in kindness and to be uplifting. And of course there is the need to be aware of my parenting, disciplining, and the example I set for my children.
I was reading Parenting magazine last week and saw that “the average preschooler argues with his parents 20 to 25 times per hour.” (Dec/Jan 2012 issue, pg. 44) Being a parent of a preschool aged child, I admit that arguing is an issue that we deal with daily. While once every two minutes is more extreme than what we are experiencing, it does seem like we are constantly pointing out to Nathan that he is arguing and that we will not be tolerating that kind of attitude. The past two weeks (since I have felt better having this 2 week break from chemo and have been able to be with the kids all day) we have had to have a few ‘smack down days’ regarding this topic. In parenting and guiding Nathan to be aware of when he is arguing or being negative minded, it has also made me realize when I too am of an argumentative spirit and exhibiting negativity.
This has been quite a revelation into my inner self and my outside interactions with others. How much more pleasant and enjoyable being a parent, friend, wife and human in general could be if I were to choose to focus on the positive in all situations rather than being drawn into the negative realm.
The scripture Philippians 4:8 reads, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
I have realized that this is not some new age, touchy feely way of thinking. This is a mindset desired by God. In tuning my mind to be aware of what is positive, true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy… I hope that I will not only be more at peace in this earthly life, but that I will also be closer to God and have a better understanding of His plan for my life.
Hopefully I am more successful this year with the resolution of eliminating negativity than I have been in the past with my goal of enjoying onion dip and chips. But then again, enjoying one of the worlds most perfect snacks is a pretty great resolution to have to try over and over again!
Recently saw this story and thought it was perfect to share:
TWO WOLVES
One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, "My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all.
"One is Evil - It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
"The other is Good - It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: "Which wolf wins?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."
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