Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Looking Forward - Our Bucket Lists

This pick was taken at last weeks treatment.
Just 2 more to go... and I am totally counting!

Today is my 35th birthday. In addition to whatever sweet gifts my husband and kids will give me, I will also receive a drip line of saline, a sack of Benadryl (so that I won’t have an allergic reaction to my chemo) and a large clear bag of Taxol. Yep, I’ll be spending this glorious birthday morning in the chemo lab. It’s okay. I suppose I could be spending the day somewhere worse… like prison or in a cell phone store (my least favorite place on earth). I am sure everything will go fine and by 2pm I’ll be home in bed snuggled up with my pup. 

The past few weeks have been an interesting phase of this chemotherapy journey. When I met with my oncologist a few weeks ago he asked me how my energy was. My response was that I  had actually noticed an increase in energy and felt great. He replied something like, “Yeah, after this coming treatment patients usually start to feel a sharp decline in energy and experience more fatigue.” He wasn’t joking. I think it has been about 4 weeks since I have felt good. I am not sick and nauseous like during the first 8 week series of chemo, this is different. I just feel constantly exhausted. My muscles and bones ache nearly all the time. There has been a little bit of neuropathy in my hands and feet but not enough to complain about. I feel irritable and emotional just about all the time (which is as draining for me as it is for my poor husband.) Something peculiar I have noticed is that when I am resting or busy I seem to be very aware of my breathing and heartbeat. I am not sure how to explain it. It’s just like I am more in tune with the basic functions of my body as a machine. It is all very strange to experience.

With just two more treatments to go I am beginning to look toward the future and starting to plan for when I am healthy. I have been making plans for how to bring color and life to our backyard and garden and been playing with some ideas of how to create a front porch patio area in our front yard. Looking forward to the change of the season (not that we have really had an honest winter) has been a great way to keep my attitude up and focused on the future instead of the frustrations of today.

I came across something this week that I thought could be fun to share. Last August, when Eric and I went on our anniversary trip I was able to cross off an item from my 'Bucket List.' The item was to ‘Sail in the San Francisco Bay’. We had a delightful day in the bay, sailing from Treasure Island, out toward Alcatraz, inward near the piers and then under the Bay Bridge back to the marina. It was a beautiful 4 hour tour… loved every minute of it. Anyways, I found the 'Bucket Lists' that we made that weekend. In no particular order here’s what we have left on our lists:

v   Take a guided white water rafting trip down the Colorado River/Grand Canyon.
v    Successfully grow a herb garden. (I have tried 3 times without success.)
v    Coach my kids soccer team.
v    Ride in a hot air balloon.
v    Go to Yosemite (never been there) and hike Halfdome.
v    Go deep-sea fishing and catch something.
v    Watch a live human birth. (As a spectator, not a participant.)
v    Own and learn to drive a Harley Davidson. Take Sunday drive through country roads.
v  Eat the world’s most perfect peach. All conditions must be perfect… juiciness, size, color, location, and emotional state when eating.

v    Attend a Super Bowl.
v    Break 80 in a golf game.
v    Golf at ALL of the following:
o      St. Andrews, Scotland
o      Pebble Beach, Carmel
o      Torrey Pines, San Diego
o      TPC Sawgrass, MD
o      Kapawalia, HI
v    Marry/Be the Official at our kids weddings.
v    Dance with Leah at her wedding.
v    Hold a grandbaby.
v    Go to Yosemite. (He has never been there either.)
v    Fly a fighter jet.

I thought it was a little funny how most of my list requires good health and most of Eric’s requires A LOT of money. I am thinking this summer I need to try to accomplish one or possibly two of the items on my list. Hmmm… which should I try to conqueror?

For my birthday, let's have an online dream party!
What’s on your ‘Bucket List?’


    The deep sea fishing would be a no-no in my opinion. What if you get sea-sick? Unlike tours and sailing I think the staying still out there can be a killer. I have no idea though... Maybe feeling sick after all you have been through? No thanks.
    A herb garden could be good. You can employ the kids to help out - maybe one of THEM has the magic touch that will lead to success?
    Yosemite wins in my opinion... Both of you want to do it. And all that majestic beauty - a BIG change from the chemo lab!!!

  2. I want to see the Northern Lights in person. And I will one day soon!

    1. Love it. Great item for the list... I imagine it's amazing.

  3. Happy birthday! On my bucket list I have "go on a cruise in Antarctica"

  4. I always wanted to hike the Peruvian Alps. All those little remote villages...but since my grandchildren and vacations generally go hand in hand, top priority is spending the most precious time with them, no matter the location.

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    1. Pam, That would be incredible and I would be very interested in being able to join you guys. I've seen that event posted for years and always thought it would be a ton of fun. Thanks... and looking forward to hearing from you on this!

  6. Happy Birthday! Hot air balloon is def on my list. So funny that I love that movie, too and have been working on my own bucket list...maybe it's the idea of 35 in front of us...

  7. Heidi's bucket list
    - climb half dome
    - go to Disney World
    - go snow shoeing
    - see my girls grow to be strong independent woman
    - hopefully hold my grand children (pushing for later than sooner...hahaha)
    - take a cruise through Europe
    - see the great wall of china
    - see the colors change on the East Coast

  8. Happy Birthday Kelly! Hugs and love from the Lozano's. Still want you over for dinner. It will be the Lozano Melting Pot

  9. Jake says he can help your husband break 80. You can take a lesson from him online: http://www.swingpal.com/instructors/jacob-marta or go see Jake's dad at Cordova Golf Course.
    Our friend got to fly in a jetfighter in dog fight just like Top Gun for his birthday down here at Miramar. I don't know how expensive it was but it was pretty cool.