|This pick was taken at last weeks treatment.|
Just 2 more to go... and I am totally counting!
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Looking Forward - Our Bucket Lists
Today is my 35th birthday. In addition to whatever sweet gifts my husband and kids will give me, I will also receive a drip line of saline, a sack of Benadryl (so that I won’t have an allergic reaction to my chemo) and a large clear bag of Taxol. Yep, I’ll be spending this glorious birthday morning in the chemo lab. It’s okay. I suppose I could be spending the day somewhere worse… like prison or in a cell phone store (my least favorite place on earth). I am sure everything will go fine and by 2pm I’ll be home in bed snuggled up with my pup.
The past few weeks have been an interesting phase of this chemotherapy journey. When I met with my oncologist a few weeks ago he asked me how my energy was. My response was that I had actually noticed an increase in energy and felt great. He replied something like, “Yeah, after this coming treatment patients usually start to feel a sharp decline in energy and experience more fatigue.” He wasn’t joking. I think it has been about 4 weeks since I have felt good. I am not sick and nauseous like during the first 8 week series of chemo, this is different. I just feel constantly exhausted. My muscles and bones ache nearly all the time. There has been a little bit of neuropathy in my hands and feet but not enough to complain about. I feel irritable and emotional just about all the time (which is as draining for me as it is for my poor husband.) Something peculiar I have noticed is that when I am resting or busy I seem to be very aware of my breathing and heartbeat. I am not sure how to explain it. It’s just like I am more in tune with the basic functions of my body as a machine. It is all very strange to experience.
With just two more treatments to go I am beginning to look toward the future and starting to plan for when I am healthy. I have been making plans for how to bring color and life to our backyard and garden and been playing with some ideas of how to create a front porch patio area in our front yard. Looking forward to the change of the season (not that we have really had an honest winter) has been a great way to keep my attitude up and focused on the future instead of the frustrations of today.
I came across something this week that I thought could be fun to share. Last August, when Eric and I went on our anniversary trip I was able to cross off an item from my 'Bucket List.' The item was to ‘Sail in the San Francisco Bay’. We had a delightful day in the bay, sailing from Treasure Island, out toward Alcatraz, inward near the piers and then under the Bay Bridge back to the marina. It was a beautiful 4 hour tour… loved every minute of it. Anyways, I found the 'Bucket Lists' that we made that weekend. In no particular order here’s what we have left on our lists:
v Take a guided white water rafting trip down the Colorado River/Grand Canyon.
v Successfully grow a herb garden. (I have tried 3 times without success.)
v Coach my kids soccer team.
v Ride in a hot air balloon.
v Go to Yosemite (never been there) and hike Halfdome.
v Go deep-sea fishing and catch something.
v Watch a live human birth. (As a spectator, not a participant.)
v Own and learn to drive a Harley Davidson. Take Sunday drive through country roads.
v Eat the world’s most perfect peach. All conditions must be perfect… juiciness, size, color, location, and emotional state when eating.
v Attend a Super Bowl.
v Break 80 in a golf game.
v Golf at ALL of the following:
o St. Andrews, Scotland
o Pebble Beach, Carmel
o Torrey Pines, San Diego
o TPC Sawgrass, MD
o Kapawalia, HI
v Marry/Be the Official at our kids weddings.
v Dance with Leah at her wedding.
v Hold a grandbaby.
v Go to Yosemite. (He has never been there either.)
v Fly a fighter jet.
I thought it was a little funny how most of my list requires good health and most of Eric’s requires A LOT of money. I am thinking this summer I need to try to accomplish one or possibly two of the items on my list. Hmmm… which should I try to conqueror?
For my birthday, let's have an online dream party!
What’s on your ‘Bucket List?’