A Walk To Remember

My sweet family wearing pink
and showing me love & support.
Photo by Nicolette Jean Photography

I have received several sweet “how you doing” & “are you okay” messages in the past few days as I have been pretty quiet lately. So sorry to be in hiding… I am just ridiculously tired. I’ve had so many people that have not had cancer, go through chemo or do radiation treatments assure me that radiation would be a breeze, but contrary to popular belief, it has kinda been like a daily beating. I’ve heard from a few people who have gone through radiation (without chemo) that the symptoms usually associated with radiation start to appear during week three – which is what my doctor told me to expect. Yet, I have spoken to three other women who went through chemo and radiation (like me) and they have confirmed what I am feeling… that the fatigue hits in the first few days. I am so tired it is bizarre.

Additionally, for me radiation has been a very emotional and mental fight. I have actually been surprised by this reality. Even though I am usually in and out of the radiation center in less than 15 minutes, almost every day there has been some sort of emotional exchange while in the facility. On my 1^st day of treatment, I laid on the table for about 45 minutes as they re-aligned my ink marks with the laser beam. My ears were full of tears that had dripped down my face as I oozed emotion through my tear ducts. Because I could not move, the tears just pooled up. You feel so vulnerable lying there naked as this enormous machine encircles you working its magic. A Survivor Sister shared the following verse with me, which she said she would meditate on during radiation as she prayed for protection from burning, pain, and radiation going anywhere besides where it is supposed to be. Psalm 121:5 “The LORD himself watches over you! The LORD stands beside you as your protective shade.” I have found great comfort in these words… but still, some days are hard.

10 treatments down... 23 to go!

But enough about that… I need to share about how awesome the Relay For Life was! First off… thank you to so many of you for your donation to the American Cancer Society. Together we raised $2, 956!!! I am proud to share that I won the award for ”Most Money Raised By An Individual” – but really the winner is American Cancer Society and the cancer patients, future patients, families and research that will be done as a result of your amazing generosity. All I can say is that being completely obnoxious about fundraising totally paid off! I know many of you made donations in memory of loved ones – it was my honor to walk for them and you.

The Survivor Walk

The day was great. I got there at 7:30am for the Survivors Breakfast - they really did treat us like royalty. Then after the opening ceremony I walked arm in arm with two Survivor Sisters that I have come to love as we strutted our stuff around the field in the Survivors Lap. My husband and kids came out to cheer me on and as I got up to join the other survivors on the track, my little Nathan hollered, “Have fun Mommy!” It was fun. When we got back to the start he wanted to know if I won. With tears, my answer was “Yes.”

I had made a challenge to
take a lap in high heels.
Well... I did my best. 

There were booths set up around the track with raffles and stuff to buy to help make money for ACS. I was able to personally decorate the luminary bags that had been donated by my friends/family in memory of a loved one. Some friends came to visit and walk with me, there was a special Survivors lunch, special music and all sorts of activities throughout the day. Oh… and I walked 6 of the half hour blocks around the field as part of our relay team. Was I tired? Yes. Was it a good day? One of the best.

As the sun began to set, they lit all of the luminary bags that lined the field. There was a special Luminary Ceremony and then everyone in attendance walked a lap in silence in memory of those lost to cancer, which was followed by a lap where bagpipes played Amazing Grace. It was a somber, humbling experience. Seeing all of the hundreds of bags, each representing a life stole by this nasty disease. I think I experienced every possible emotion while walking those laps. As Eric held my hand tightly, I cried tears of sadness and joy. I felt angry and saved. So many thoughts crossed my mind… what an experience.

The morning belonged to survivors. The day to the fight. And the night belonged to those lost. It really was a beautiful event.

Look at my fancy paper certificate.!
Woot - Woot

I camped out over night with my team and hung out until and 9:00am for the closing ceremony and to participate in the final lap. I’m so glad I stuck it out. After winning the award, I was able to get into a conversation with the coordinator of our local ACS events. I ask her how I could volunteer for the ‘Making Strides Against Breast Cancer’ walk that is held in October at the capitol. She looked at me and asked, “Do you want to volunteer that day… or serve on the committee?” Well… since she put it that way, I chose to join the committee. Our first meeting is in a few weeks so I don’t yet know what I got myself into, but I do know that I have been asking God what the heck he wants me to do with this experience, so maybe this is the beginning of something exciting.

I know I can say it a million times, but I do not know that you can all truly comprehend how much I appreciate your support in this. Being part of Relay For Life was bigger than me or my story… which was cool. It was a way to give back to an organization that helped me personally and helps so many others on a daily basis. This was an important mark in my journey and a huge step toward hope and healing… thank you!

 ***As a community, the Elk Grove Relay For Life raised a tad over $85,000! 

I want to recognize so many of you that added to the success of this event. 

Thanks a million!

Challenge To Donate - Businesses

Whiteley Photography  (Donated 3 Portrait Sessions)

Cupcake Cuties Bakery (Donated 6 Dozen Gourmet Cupcaked)

Ammin Nut Company   (Donated an Almond Butter Gift Basket)

Luminaries Donated In Memory Of:

Joanne Clark

Jan Irey

Dan Angeloni “Big Papa”

Julio Torres

Luann Larson

Thank you for your donation to the 

America Cancer Society. (In no particular order…)

In Memory of Joann Clark

Andria & Rob St. Evans

Rosa & David Magana

Lynell Cuthberson

Ed & Donna Monroe

Deanna & Mike Lockhart

Ken & Stacey Hisey

Barbara & Tom Sisson

Rhonna Dra

Al & Carroll Amator

David Key

Holly Cybuski

Joel Archer

Sally & Bob Finkbeiner

Ryan & Megan Marcroft

In Memory of Jan Irey

Anna Schwiesenger

Pam Robertson

Emily Brown

Pat & Bob Montgomery

Gaye & Tom Bone

Heather & Chris Bendinelli

Nancy & Bruce Lofgren

Camryn Thomas

Bobbie Lewis

Louisa Bwers

Lori & Scott Bergenstock

Susan & Tim Jones

Jennifer Buwella

Liz & Tim Driessen

In Memory of Dan Angeloni

Joni & Glen Kelley

Bradi Lomack

Candice Morton

Gregg & Candice Stetzer

Kim Key

Stu & Christal Kapicka

Gary Perkowitz

Phillip & Emily Ramey

Frank & Shirley DeLange

Kelly & Rodrigo Rodriguez

Faith Conley

Jennifer Brooks

Rebecca Hainz-bBxter

Melissa & Toby Van Horn

In Memory of Julio Torres

Kyle & Rebecca Bruns

Heather & Aren Bazzocco

Shannon Anderson

Gayle Calderone

Shandela & Dane Brooks

Signe Weeks

Glen & Debbie Brasel

Amy & Michael Erwin

Elisabeth & Joel Walsh

Clay & Francine Whiteley

Nancy Fiole

Julianne Christ

Danielle & Jay Joost

Kristen & Jason Fullmore

In Memory of Luann Larson

Eather & Ron Marcroft

Tom & Debbie Ramsay

Leslie & Bill Randall

Rebecca Erickson

Michael & Brooke McClimans

Sommer & Eric Horn

Gary & Kris Randall

*** If I forgot anyone I am so sorry. It would not mean that your donation didn’t go through… it would have been my error in tracking emails. 

My Survivor Sister Jackie & I flashing our medals!

The "Hope Wall"
Yes... Eric and Leah are sword fighting.

Nathan signed the "Hope Wall"

Little Missy and Mommy

Self Portrait
"Time To Get Some Rest"